Since coming to South Africa there have been a few times that I have made the mistake of thinking that I am someone coming to help. People at home sometimes think the same way- “Wow, how great of you to go help and volunteer”. I have noticed that this understanding has potential to cause some problems. After attending the We Have Faith rally for COP 17, MUD4 discussed a little about why there may have been low attendance. It was a good reminder to hear that many people in this world are not so concerned about climate justice when they do not even have dinner to serve or people in this area may not recycle because they do not even have proper trash pick up. I began to think about my own site and the way I think that I have been helping to ‘educate’ the children I am with each day.

Working at Thusong Children’s Center I have been able to come up with various programs for the children along with the other volunteers. We brainstorm with each other about what types of workshops or activities we can organize to benefit the different ages and genders. Normally what happens is that we decided based on what we each are familiar with. One volunteer knows how to sew, so she made beanbags with them. Another has knowledge on art history, another with South African history, another on sports, and myself with knowledge concerning sexual assault. These are the things that we try to base workshops and activities around for the kids when they have free afternoons.

I mean, I think it somewhat resourceful. Myself and the other volunteers are using the knowledge we have to share and educate the children at Thusong. I think that my professors would be proud. Problem is I’m not sure that the kids at Thusong are truly that interested. For a ‘street kid’ who doesn’t attend school, it is hard to believe that he benefits much from zoning out while being informed about ‘important’ things. Spending my final semester at school studying sexual assault and facilitating workshops around campus was both eye opening and beneficial to me. But what does this mean for a child who may be currently experiencing this abuse or one having been taken from his or her home because of sexual assault? Not exactly the same as talking with a group of freshmen who joke about what may happen at a frat party. It’s been difficult thinking about what these children have faced or are currently facing. I want to help. How can I use my previous experiences or knowledge to do so?

During the first MUD retreat we went around the circle and each told about the walls we have been facing, the difficulties that we struggle with. Then we went around again and talked about the ways that we can conquer or deal with these struggles. Each of us came up with an answer or result for getting passed the struggle. It’s like we could come up with the biggest problems we face daily in South Africa and also somewhat of an answer to that problem or a way to cope within just a few minutes. If only everything could be worked out that quickly. It’s hard to wrap my head around.

The ELCA Global Mission did not appoint me to inform South Africa about what I learned in my favorite college courses. They definitely did not appoint me to come and feel sorry for my community and others around this part of the world. During the rest of the year it will be important for me to continue questioning why I’m here. Though I am comfortable and able to just ‘be’, IS there something I can ‘do’?